Any landing you can walk away from is a good one, right?!? Talk about a tale of two halves. That W down in Tampa felt like watching Boogie Nights. Halftime was essentially Little Bill's final exit. Who cares if it was about as aesthetically enjoyable as watching Andy Reid hula-hoop with no shirt on? Do you know what is extremely pleasing to the eye? Watching Tom Brady get dropped on his ass by Rashan Gary. That is a true work of art. They should put a picture of that in the freaking Louvre. I mean, did Jackson Pollack ever sack an ageless vampire robot in subhuman Florida heat? I didn't think so. 

Listen, I don't care if Tom Brady was missing some (all?) of his weapons. I don't care that he is midway through his fifth decade on this God-forsaken rock. And, I certainly don't care that he has had so much work done that his face is starting to resemble the plastic St. Nick in The Santa Clause 2. He is still Tom Effing Brady. Did I nearly blackout on that two-point attempt? Did my heart tighten in my chest? Of course, I did. Who are you? My cardiologist? This is getting personal. I digress. Let's get this thing back on track. Grab a cup of coffee, settle in, and let's see if we can find four things that Packer fans the world over can agree upon coming out of this monumentally awesome week three win.

• Agreement #1--Can we agree that it was damn nice to see 69 back?

You know that feeling when you get home from a long vacation? That feeling of joy that sleeping in your own bed brings? The rapture of utilizing your own toilet (maybe that's just me?)? That was the emotion coursing through my veins seeing Ol' Number 69 back at his post on Sunday afternoon. It had been 636 long days since David Bakhtiari had suited up in the Green and Gold (we are not counting that Lions game in Week 18 last year--the less said about that game, the better). It felt like an eternity. And, if fans were that jazzed to see him back on the field, imagine how incredible that had to feel for Dave himself. The chance to finally take out two and a half years' worth of frustration, helplessness, and doubt on an opposing defensive end? Truly a wonderful sight. 

Don't get it twisted--this is no slight at Yosh Nijman. Yosh was solid as oak in Dave's stead. But, seeing 69 blocking Rodgers blindside just hits different. Was he a smidge rusty? Yessir. Was that to be expected? Absolutely. Hell, the last time Bakhtiari took any meaningful snaps, the Packers were playing in empty stadiums, Larry King was alive, and Gamestop stock was still trading at 4 dollars a share. That was a loooonnggg time ago. That's what made it so satisfying to see Rodgers and Dave sharing a moment (Sharing a moment? What the hell? Are we talking about football or a Hallmark movie?) in the end zone after Romeo Doub's first quarter touchdown. Was LaFleur's platooning idea a little sideways? Sure was. But, I understand Matt's logic. This is galaxy brain shit. Planning for not only this week but three months from now. It's shortsighted to burn Bakhtiari out for one glorious September afternoon in the relentless Tampa humidity when we are going to need him for an even more grand night in Phoenix this coming February.   

• Agreement #2--Can we agree that Aaron Rodgers is the rising tide?

David Lee Roth famously left Van Halen on April's Fool Day in 1985. Roth, a legendary narcissist, was convinced to his core that he alone was the key to Van Halen's success and was increasingly desperate to prove it. Over the ensuing years, Mr. Lee Roth would land two singles on Billboard's Rock Top Ten chart and sell 4 million albums worldwide. Van Halen, meanwhile, would go on to chart 19 songs and sell 26 million albums. Advantage Eddie. Now, I don't mean to disparage Diamond Dave (Ain't Got Nobody is an all-timer), but, history doesn't lie. Right now (bonus points for the clever pun!) Aaron Rodgers is Van Halen. Nathaniel Hackett, Luke Getsy, and Davante Adams are David Lee Roth. 

Listen, once a Packer, always a Packer to me. I am not taking cheap shots here. Just calling it as I see it. Davante Adams is currently struggling through the worst three-week stretch of his entire career. Nathaniel Hackett is shepherding the NFL's second-lowest scoring offense. And, Luke Getsy's QB in Chicago has a whopping 23 completions spread across 3 games. For the record, Aaron Rodgers had 27 completions on Sunday alone. Did these three fellows suddenly have their talent sucked out by the Monstars from Space Jam? Doubtful. Maybe their sudden drop-off has to do with leaving the watchful nest that Aaron Rodger's prodigious talent provides. Quick--name me the last offensive coach/player who left the Packers and went on to have a career year. Waiting Waiting. It never happens.  

You can't fault someone for wanting to cash in. And, indeed, Green Bay, Wisconsin is not necessarily a tourist destination (I didn't 'say it--Aaron did!). But, what these three Benedict Arnolds are finding out, and what Jordy Nelson, Randall Cobb, Greg Jennings, James Jones, Mike McCarthy, and the countless others who have left Green Bay for more fruitful fields already know--Aaron Rodgers grows the greenest grass in the NFL. 

• Agreement #3--Can we agree that this offense needs to develop a goldfish memory?

Marcedes Lewis' fumble in the divisional round game against San Francisco. Christian Watson's epic drop in Week One against the Vikings. Aaron Jones's regrettable one-yard mistake last Sunday against Tampa. In three out of the last four games, the Packers have allowed simple first-half mistakes to completely derail their offensive production. I could see a younger team succumbing to this type of chicanery, but for a team as veteran as the Packers? Truly baffling. These are highly paid, wildly talented professional athletes we are talking about. Not sugar cubes in a rain storm.  

Be it a lack of execution, a dearth of mental toughness, or perhaps a play calling disconnect, if Green Bay wants to be playing deep into January, they need to figure this out immediately. You don't burn down your house because your kid wrote on the wall with a marker. You don't donate your car to charity because you got a flat tire. Over the last few years, LaFleur has gathered a bit of a reputation as a front-runner (not completely unfairly). When it's going well under Matt, it is going great. And, that is the case more often than not. But, when things get off to a rocky start, it goes downhill quickly (ie--San Francisco 2020, New Orleans 2021, Minnesota 2022).

Now this unfortunate happenstance is spreading into our in-game performance. Perhaps, this is just a by-product of Rodgers getting acquainted with his new receiving options, and this ship will right itself with more familiarity. Or, it could just be some aberrant occurrence, like getting struck by lightning or my eight-year-old not complaining about what's for dinner, and in three weeks this argument will make about as much sense as the last episode of Lost. I hope it's that. But, what if it's not? Matt LaFleur's appearance suggests someone that does not like when things are out of place (I wonder what Matt's id thinks of Rodgers's new hairdo). Maybe, Matt's fastidious approach is manifesting itself in unexpected ways. Teams do tend to take on a coach's personality. That's why the Dallas Cowboys have started eating mandatory fourth meals each day. Whatever the malady, I think the team would be best served by a shorter memory and a longer leash.

• Agreement #4--Can we agree that the Fox Sweat Cam was a really bad idea?

I get that football broadcasts can be a little stuffy sometimes. And, with these ever-ballooning salaries of NFL commentators, finding new talent is tough. But, what in the living hell was Fox thinking with the Greg Olsen Sweat Cam on Sunday's broadcast? This wasn't some meaningless contest between two hapless teams in mid-October. Nor, was this the third quarter of an absolute blowout where you are looking to fill dead air with silly hijinks. No, sir. Brady vs Rodgers. The two most bankable entities in the NFL. Living GOATs. Five minutes to go in a one-score game featuring two of the best five teams in the NFL. And, Fox decided to spend a solid three minutes not only telling you but also showing you, just how sweaty Greg Olsen, the lead analyst on Fox's new number one broadcast team, was in the broadcast booth.

Do you know what I don't want to see while I am nervously punching down my second box of Milk Duds in the waning minutes of an NFL Sunday afternoon? A detailed account of Greg Olsen's perspiration-soaked white sateen dress shirt. Greg, my dude, you played your college ball in Miami. You know Florida well. You had to have known how hot that game was going to be. And, you still chose a silky white dress shirt? Didn't anybody tell you the rule about white after Labor Day? While we are on the subject, what the hell was going on with Olsen's hair? It looked like he swiped his 'do from Dennis Franz in Hill Street Blues. Holy crow. Greg Olsen's vibe during that game screamed "I picked a hell of a day to stop sniffing glue".  

Call me crazy, but I don't remember Fox ever highlighting Troy Aikman's chaffing or John Madden's chronic swamp ass. You guys paid billions for the rights to air games just like this one. Your execs make millions upon millions of dollars to think up new ideas and fun little wrinkles for your NFL coverage. Surely, you can come up with something better than the Sweat Cam.

• Catching Strays

The two high safety shell is the in-field shift of the NFL. It sucks and it is making football less fun to watch.

When did Aaron Rodgers start dressing like he is one of the DJs in The Chainsmokers?

Seeing Green Bay's uniforms baking in that unforgiving Tampa sun felt like eating a full turkey dinner on the Fourth of July.

Matt LaFleur's halftime adjustments this season have been eerily reminiscent of Geraldo Rivera opening Al Capone's vault.

You knew it was hot AF in Tampa because Fox was allowing Erin Andrews to wear short sleeves. 

One of these Pat O'Donnell punts is going to dislodge an NSA satellite.

If the Packers are going to insist on playing games that snug, I am gonna have to start buying pharmaceutical-grade beta blockers off of DarkFox.

On to New England.  GO PACK GOES!!!